The Big M! – Diary Entry 1,2 &3

Friday 1st March

Ok so a couple of  weeks ago I started getting anxious about a pain in my breast.

By the time a week had passed my anxious mind had decided it was breast cancer and that I should contact the doctors.

After a quick phone call she had called me in for some blood tests the following week.

Her thoughts about the pain and other symptoms I’d been having (tinnitus, heart rate changes, anxiety creeping up and up e.t.c.)  were the same thing I had thought for a while (well before the irrational fear of breast cancer came to my head) Menopause.

I mean I had a hysterectomy not yet 2 years ago and I had been wondering at what point my menopause would kick in because although Id kept my ovaries I was told that menopause would probably happen a few years earlier than it would have!

I have been saying to my mum for a while that I wonder if some of my little niggles are menopause symptoms.


Monday 4th March

Blood test day. I’ve grown more anxious about the pain in my breast and I’ve convinced myself I need to see the dr.

I think maybe I’ve not told her enough for her to make the correct decision.

Wednesday 5th March

Today I have been for my appointment with the doctor. Both myself and I think my doctor were  hopeful the blood tests would come back with the answer.

Unfortunately the blood tests were normal.

The doctor however is adamant that it is the early stages of menopause and that the oestrogen has just not depleted from my brain yet! although the brain fog I have would say otherwise!

So I’m on a course of oestrogen only patches or HRT. I have to go back in another couple of months and let her know how I’m feeling.

Meanwhile the pain and “oddness” in my breast she is sure is nothing to worry about but I’m to just keep an eye on it to make sure.

I have to say I really thought I would come out with a proper defined answer to all of my symptoms and in a way I have but I still cant help but worry when the blood tests came back normal!

So for now I have decided to try and put the worry out of my head (which for a self confessed hypochondriac is not easy) and start  my HRT of which I’ve chosen patches meanwhile I have self referred to Insight for some talking therapy to try calming my nerves and lift my depression.

I will of course try and post any updates.

* I have attached my first patch, which was straight forward I just hope it stays stuck especially when I go swimming later in the week.


Thanks for dropping by

If you have any tips to help me get through this chapter in my life they would be very much appreciated!

Nina x